The other day I took my oldest to the park to play. What I discovered was truly shocking to my inner psyche. I’ve become the yoga pant wearing mom I thought I would never become! As I took in the moms around me, every single one of them had on a workout outfit, aka comfy clothes.
I looked at myself and discovered that I had on comfy black stretchy pants and a loose fitting top with my hair pulled back into a ponytail. Ummm…yeah.
While there’s nothing wrong with this attire, I had a moment of true contemplation. Before becoming a mom, there are some things I said I would never do and wearing comfy clothes on a daily basis was one of them. My pre-mom, know-it-all self thought that I would get up every morning, have a good length of time to spend with Jesus, take a nice long shower, and take my time to choose my outfit of choice for the day. (I can hear you laughing). Reality truly was a hard slap in the face. Lol!
Needless to say, I’ve become proud of being a yoga pant wearing mom.
My time with Jesus turns out to be regular conversation with Him every moment of my day. It’s not just limited to my private time and my kids get to see how to incorporate Jesus in the everyday.
Instead of taking my nice long shower, I get a quick shower and the opportunity to help get my babies get fed and ready for the day.
Instead of taking my time to get dressed for the day, I pick an outfit that allows me to lift and transport my double stroller at every pit stop. Practicality is my reality.
This is my baby boy. I could write so much about this whole experience thus far, but I think this picture says it all for now. I love him. And I’m so thankful for him.
My husband and I are in the throes of parenting, very involved in ministry and determined to pursue and accomplish our personal goals. As much as we love our kids, I have to admit that it sometimes feels like we were invaded by these small humans (who will soon become big humans). Key word: invaded. They consume our mornings, days and nights. They bring laughter and tears and frustration! They bring out the best in us and the worst in us. Still, in the middle of it all, they love us unconditionally and look at us with such trust in their eyes.
It’s changed my perspective on some things:
1. Organization. I thought I was pretty organized before having kids. I wasn’t. Having a child and then having another child has increased my need for organization and has helped define what it means to truly manage time. Do I have it down yet? No. If I did, my blog posts would be more consistent. :)
2. My Desires vs Their Needs. The struggle is real. The pull to do “my thing” is so strong sometimes that I feel like I have to give myself a reality check every so often. Lol. By “my thing” I mean the things I’ve dreamed of doing. The things that would require more of my time than I’m able and willing to commit to at this point. The things that I envisioned doing at this age and stage of my life. I’m doing some of it, but there’s more. How do I deal with it? I remind myself that I’m on God’s timetable. I believe that the decisions I’ve made to get to this point in my life are God decisions, and I trust that His timing is perfect. My children’s needs, as demanding as they seem right now, are what’s important. I don’t get these days back. As they grow older, their needs don’t necessarily diminish, but they do change. If I’m honest with myself, doing “my thing” has been redefined to “meeting their needs” for this season of my life. And I’m ok with that.
3. Motherhood. It is what I thought it would be, and so much more. It’s what I thought it would be because I expected the sleepless nights, the diminished amount of privacy and the joyous milestones. The “so much more” comes in with the very deep desire to see my children live passionately in their God-given purpose and become strong people who contribute to making the world a better place. Yes, this desire is normal; I just didn’t expect to feel it so strongly and so deeply.
We’ve been invaded by kids and we’re taking every bit of it in stride. We wouldn’t trade our lives for anything. Because of them, I feel like I understand the love of the Father so much more. And it’s great!
One of my posts went rogue last week. If you were a recipient of one of those posts, I apologize. I blame it on post-pregnancy hormone craziness. Because I can. :)
So I don’t know about you, but I feel like I’m still trying to gain tread on this new year. The other day I mentioned to my husband that I feel like our new year is going to begin on February 1st. We’re still in organization mode, trying to get a handle on becoming parents of a toddler and a baby. We love it; I think we just forgot how tired we were when we had Gia. Tired has become a state of being, at least for now. :)
If anything, the slow start has only strengthened my resolve to get some things started. Things in the natural may be slow going, but my heart and my spirit are stirred up for what’s to come in 2015!
So in an effort to keep it short and sweet, if you’ve been slow going in your kick off to the new year, it’s ok! Tomorrow is only a few minutes away (if you’re on the West coast in North America) and it’s never too late to start a new thing! See you tomorrow!
His words to me for 2015…
My fire is an all consuming fire. It won’t destroy you. It will refine you.
Hebrews 12:29 – “For our God is a consuming fire.”
Malachi 3:2 – “…For He is like a refiner’s fire…”
Make me a carrier of Your fire, so I’m hot to touch.
Hot with the fire of the Holy Spirit, flowing like lava with the love of Jesus.
Burn the unholy things and consume me with Your fire
So I’m not destroyed, but refined into a vessel for your use.
Some of the best conversations are those that you overhear; they’re the most candid. Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t go around eavesdropping on conversations. Today I sat on a park bench next to two ladies having a conversation. I tried to distract myself by scrolling through Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, but you can only do that for so long. I had no choice but to overhear what they had to say. What fascinated me the most though is how similar their thoughts are to most women I encounter. Saved or not yet saved at the core of every woman are these three things (at minimum). :)
1. A desire to love
2. A desire to be loved
3. To not end up alone
These ladies discussed their desire to love someone even if the someone didn’t appreciate their expression of love. They talked about longing to have someone value them for who they are. The ladies expressed their dismay at still being alone at this stage in life.
As I listened to them, I thought about how thankful I am. As a believer, these three desires are met by God, and He’s gracious enough to bring people into our lives to fulfill these desires as well.
1. My desire to love: Galatians 5:13-14
2. My desire to be loved: John 3:16
3. To not end up alone: Hebrews 13:5
At my core, I know with confidence that my love, even if disregarded, is never wasted.
At my core, I know that His perfect love dispels any fear of missing out on love.
At my core, I know that He was very present in my past, He’s ordering the steps of my present and He will be the beacon of hope in my future.
His love never fails.
I don’t know why people hate on New Years resolutions. I think they’re a great idea if they’re realistic. Who doesn’t hope for growth and change each year? I think that sometimes we get really optimistic about the new year and set goals that look good in our heads, but aren’t even remotely possible. That’s where we get into trouble! Because when or if we don’t accomplish the goals, we feel like we failed in some way.
I try not to let the excitement of the new year overshadow the reality of what it will take to move to another level in this new season. It’s going to take work and I have give myself a reality check about getting it done. Here’s my method. It might work for you or it might not. Either way, it doesn’t hurt to try something.
1. Review last year’s goals
Every year is different and there are so many unexpected events that can arise each year. The things we thought we would accomplish fall to the wayside and with that comes disappointment. Whether you accomplished all of your goals or none of your goals doesn’t matter now. Start again. Make it happen.
2. Pull up your catalog of dreams
“My dream is that one day I will…” Everyone has a list written down on paper or a list written in the heart of what we dream could be possible. Seriously, review all of the dreams in your heart, write them down and put them in order of importance. If there is anything I’ve learned, it’s that anything is possible, especially with God on my side.
Lift them up in prayer. Ask God for wisdom on which one to start with and ask for strategy on how to begin. *I didn’t say to ask for how to accomplish it because God seems to reveal His Plans in stages (at least in my life). However, He could quite possibly lay out the whole plan for you, but you won’t know His heart for you unless you ask.
4. Connect with the right people
The right people will feed your passion and help water your potential. Enough said.
5. Start doing something.
I don’t care if you start out by setting one target a week and grow from there. If you meet that target (even if it’s as small as making a phone call), confidence grows. You become consistent and feel a sense of accomplishment.
Last year is over. In a phrase from one of my favorite childhood movies, “tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it.” Let’s make the most of it and get to it in 2015!